No Judgment, no anger, no pressure for action – principles for a magical conversation?

Change is a constant and as Mark Manson in The Subtle Art of not giving a F*ck says “uncertainty is the root of all growth and opportunity”. What we do know with certainty is that the workplace, be it corporate or enterprise, entrepreneur or academic, management or worker bee, is changing and therein lies out opportunity to create a future unlike the past blending life and work, society and family, giving back and making profit.

11849231_379372528927960_1427513343_nFor me, careful consideration needs to be given to the conversations (and awareness within every word shared) as to what that future will evolve into…within four years half of the workforce will be a lot younger than me (according to latest research the Global Workforce will be Millennials), and I believe it is not about just letting the young take over. I don’t believe either that the world would be better if only women ran it, I deeply know that everyone counts and that we need to value and understand the mix… men, women, young, old, every skin-tone, creed and sexual orientation, every diverse factor of who we are as human beings, needs embracing. Not so that we can win every argument or be a walk over. Indeed, I dream of a world without arguments – lively debates yes, interesting dialogues, knowledge input but not without quests to learn relevance, valuing our differences to weave that tapestry of ‘the good life’ we’d all like.

Magical conversations – run by new principles – no judgement, no anger, no pressure to action, a sacred space, the desired round-table environment, time sensitive, topic focused, remembered learning for the right reasons, a place to freely contribute and create value for all. I have been called naive in my life, ‘Mollie Sunshine’, too positive… hey I don’t apologize for any8482996_f496 of those reviews. In 10 years, my grandchildren will be teenagers on the verge of …. running their own business, contemplating a trip to Mars, taking up further learning (and not at college) or maybe something I cannot even imagine.

Let’s use our imagination, more powerful than knowledge, to be here right now in the moment, life is precious. Do you agree?

pauline@pauline-crawford-omps.com

More information on what I believe in, my vision, my passion and purpose.

Creating Magical Conversations

Power Struggle Between a Man and a Woman
Power Struggle Between a Man and a Woman

As time moves on in 2017, it becomes apparent that we’re still stuck in terms of men and women getting their act together at the top of the corporate world, the political world and many parts of our social and domestic world. There are good stories of collaboration and men and women co-creating amazing ventures together, of communities recognizing the value of women in the workplace and as leaders, yet these stories are shrouded by nasty stories of male rhetoric and vicious “put-downs” of women, and cries from women about bad behavior of men, especially prominent political figures. It’s time to stop this cycle of negativity, this struggle for power, life is a game not a battle field. It’s time to live life not kill ourselves with hate and fear.  It’s time both men and women recognized their ripples of magic before we all get sucked into  mayhem.

Let’s take business.  I hear so many stories still about how we should have more women at IMG_2253the top of business yet we don’t have the increase in numbers that is possible given the pool of educated talent available. We need to change the ‘track record’ of the criteria for women in the boardroom; and stop women still arguing the toss about whether if they had been in charge, the economic crisis would have not happened. I would like to focus on what we can do together to evolve a new ‘magical conversations’ between all parties in many diverse situations especially where we get stuck. We do this so that we can build a healthy, loving, energized and engaged thriving work and life culture, rather than keep on going over the past.

Our world is changing fast and today is no longer like yesterday so I believe it’s time to change the rules.  It is the “how’ that is our challenge!

This is the time to look outside the past restrictions which have stopped progress. Magical Conversations are not soft and fluffy. They are based on all parties being valued, all parties having an equal right to contribute and all parties understanding the ‘rules’. Ah ha you say – there are rules!  Yes simple and all-embracing. The rules are simple – no judgments, no anger, no restrictive behaviors, no outrageous or harmful img-20160731-wa0010behaviors allowed.  All must be heard, not all views are right, and not all views are wrong, but all views are considered on the table and no conclusions or decisions are made without consensus and at the very least a degree of observation, patience, perseverance and imagination.  So can you feel the magic? The magic is in the mix of contributors, the selection of topics, plus the agreed positive willingness, energy and commitment to mutually respectful outcomes.

Are people ready to shift their perspectives and be truly inclusive? Many factors come to bear but let me first focus on the gender divide and make it more dynamic and positively productive. Then magic may occur faster!

16939506_10154447883563099_4414038946700759001_nFor over 30 years I have addressed many lively groups; business men and women, many solo entrepreneurs, many corporate players, many owners of small successful businesses, and my theme is always generally about “Life, Love and Legacy” and my passion that we live a fulfilled life whether male or female, at home or at work.   My vision for my audiences to ‘take responsibility and ownership for your lives”. I am often asked by women how they can bring love and energy into their business existence and I suggest it is the only way to have a healthy existence. We need to attract wise men to live and work with us as business professionals, and also as mothers, sisters, friends, aunties, daughters and colleagues, as customers and suppliers, as multi-faceted, emotional, caring, intelligent, highly talented, visionary collaborators for today’s future.  Some men may never have been approached with this in business terms.  It’s down to us to stand by our true nature.

I believe if we all can take a wise stance, and for women to draw on our ancient wisdom, our natural strengths and attributes as females, be it of many different types and styles, generations and cultures across the world. Women can then embrace men and persuade, inform, influence and emerge new ways to work together.

cropped-img_02481.jpgMy wise advice to female audiences is consistent; let’s play our best card, draw the female baton and hand it on to other women around the world; use our whole brain, left and right, while recognizing the limitations, rules and regulations that have been placed on us can be changed.  Let yourself own the special place we’re now at and work together to give reasoned viewpoints as to why and how we change these rules.

Women have fantastic opportunities now to get involved in business, in politics, in social change and in determining our children’s future. Yes, it may be a long road of change, but it’s happening as we sleep, eat and go out to work day by day. More and more men and women want a more purposeful world, a world where work and life find a more compatible coalition. And magical conversations are occurring everywhere.img-20160324-wa0016

My questions to women (and those wise men who recognise our value) to ensure we come to together to progress our future in a sustainable and co-creative manner;

What part did women play in the design of our current world? What can women be responsible for in our conversations with women and with men?

What did each of us learn from our lives to date that give us skills that can play into business and enterprise and social change designed often by a male world and in many arenas of business for many hundreds of years?

How can we discuss, debate and declare our authentic advantage as women without threatening, fighting with or demoralising men?

And why will men listen and hear us in a way that extends an open hand of collaboration?

I am uplifted to meet more and more wise men and women, of all generations who think, feel and act in a space of conscious awareness of others and the community around them. I am being asked every week to bring these Magical Conversations into a wider arena and that I pledge to do through my programs, mentoring advice and facilitator development. I intend to set the ripple circling outwards and see how far the magic can reach.

Choice, Uncertainty and Love-Based Principles

As I p10646809_803367209713218_7116161803102089016_nresent to audiences across the world, in the UK, in Europe, in the US and currently in Malaysia, I notice variety, diversity, differences and similarities, and always magical happenings.  Yet today I find myself asking  “how, in our challenged world, do we each make the best choices using reasonable and unbiased observation?”   To help us in uncertainty, let’s use a good deal of common-sense, simplicity and love-based principles to guide us.

The world is simultaneously horrified, fascinated, thrilled, aghast, scared and amazed by choices made; Trump, Brexit, women marching enmasse, refugees fleeing and endless wars raging- and always the human rights of potentially marginalized minority groups high on everyone’s agenda. And yet so much more is occurring at an unconscious and far reaching depth that is both good and cleansing of our old stuck ways.  And it’s not all bad as so many think and fear. Of course, many don’t like uncertainty. IF we believe everything happens for a reason and nothing happens without connection to everything (as I do) then ‘hope springs eternal’ and we might accept that today ‘uncertainty is the root of all growth and possibilities’.

Change is always the current that flows and takes us forward. Time to be, to do, to think, to feel, to create differently and with compassion and understanding. The key to our future is, I believe, reasonable conversations, magical ones in deed. In these such conversations, we share our views without blame nor calling peopl1453516_10152433450297222_1129468450_ne undesirable names. We recognize that we may be diametrically opposed in our views but seek common ground that is inclusive of all needs and full of common sense as to which degree all needs can be met. Conversation, compassion and an intentional perseverance and wish to serve is essential. This forms a Magical Conversation

By listening to hear rather than knee jerk reactions to respond, we can more easily account for the many layers of difference – culture, generation, gender, sexuality, ethnicity and disability – to embrace a connected world rather than feeling caught up in every personal issue. Listen with smiles and compassion. We need to look beyond the ‘news reports’ and the media hype and where uncertain of opinion makers, be your own wisdom and share with care!

Men and 2016-12-23 12.22.03.pngwomen share this planet and the responsibility lies with us all. Let’s communicate from our heartfelt choices and common-sense heads, wise men and women alike, in true magical conversation style and allow the future to unfold without anger.  Time to co-create this love-based, healthy happy world one day at a time….join me and my husband Jim and help our legacy to become a reality as we desire to “leave the world a better place for having been here”!

Pauline Crawford-Omps is the AMBASSADOR OF MAGICAL CONVERSATIONS

Changing the RULES OF THE GAME…

1-163

Pauline Crawford leads the conversation at London Conference July 8th 2016

The field upon which the game of life – in all of its incarnations – is played out has been much maligned for some years now. Much is debated by diverse groups that we need to level or change the playing field. To allow us to move forward on this often heated debate concerning the rise of women now pursuing careers to senior roles and/or running their own businesses, please note that the playing field of business is constantly evolving and impacting lifestyles in commercial, social and domestic arenas. Please note also that the current playing field of business is usually adequate enough for the game but maybe not entirely welcoming to all players. Often we don’t notice the change and the debate focuses on the surface requirements and not the rules of the game. It would be wise now to look below the surface and engage all players to understand that the rules of the game have been found badly in need of revision and updating.

To that end we suggest that the rules of the game cited above should be amended. For starters, let us suggest that whatever the current norm is for the rules occurring at this moment in time, it must reasonably be preceded by a minimum of three additional rules. For example:

Rule 1 – Anybody who wants to play the game and is qualified to do so will be granted the opportunity to play regardless of any other factors including – but not necessarily limited to – ethnicity, national origin, religious affiliation, sexual orientation, generation and/or gender.

Rule 2 – When on the field, each player will participate with the full approval, cooperation and support of all others on the field i.e. the organization and/or individual they represent as well as other team members, associates, family members and customers.

Rule 3 – Any differences of opinion, challenges, disagreements, questions and disputes will be resolved and/or otherwise settled by referring to Rule 1.

It should be clear to every person participating in commerce – be it in such areas as business, law, education, public or private service – regardless of which side of the gender fence you find yourself on – that these three simple amendments to the RULES OF THE GAME are a good beginning. There are doubtless many additional amendments and additional rules that come to mind, but at least this is a start.

Note – when men and women co-create the rules today, it is important to value gender dynamics and the essential differences not just between men and women, but between women and between men, in alignment with the market shifts and new working patterns we see due to technology, globalization and the empowerment of women at work.

When regarding a full range of professional, social and domestic life as factors for success, the game calls on all players to contribute the co-creation of any new rules. In today’s world, a shift to a gender-balanced perspective is a key component of success. It is imperative in today’s chaotic world, that men and women invite each other to co-create the rules of the game not merely for themselves but for generations to come.

Authors – Dr James Omps and Dr Pauline Crawford

1-156 (2)Co-creators of a new blueprint, Gender Dynamics©, and upcoming book “Who’s in Charge?” these two experienced international educators herald a new era of conversation. “The time has come to sit around the table, co-create and design a new conversation, a magical conversation, for real-time, real-world needs” they suggest.  Essential to the success of such a conversation about new rules is the understanding that when men and women of many different gender-dynamics styles and diverse backgrounds, get together and value each person’s contribution without judgement (Rule 1, 2 and 3) they are the best mix for productive and sustainable results.

CHANGING THE PLAYING FIELD – Part 3 of 3

THE NEW BLUEPRINT HAS ARRIVED…

By Dr Pauline Crawford International Speaker and Facilitator

menwhogetit-12

The Time Is Now …

The much discussed and fabled playing field that so many of my gender seem so committed to changing, is the one that we all walk out onto as we prepare to challenge the men of the world to another round of “He Said … She Said!” There is one word that I would like to define before we start to choose up sides, appoint referees and crouch down into that menacing stance as we prepare to go head-to-head. That word is procrastinate. According to the highly vaunted Oxford Unabridged, it is as follows: pro·cras·ti·nate (prō-krăs′tə-nāt′, prə-) –  v.intr. To put off doing something, especially out of habitual carelessness or laziness.  v.tr. To postpone or delay needlessly.

Okay, let’s get down to business. Wait a second … that’s the game we play that is so badly in need of changing, right? I think we can agree that, while the list of male-female inequities is not be growing at an alarming rate at this minute, nothing much has been done to reduce it over the past few years. We know, for example, that the pay gap issue remains, the opportunities continue to narrow for women as they move up the corporate ladder, and that life and work are uncomfortable playmates when women choose to have a family and work outside of the home. In that regard it’s interesting to note that in the US many companies do not offer employer-sponsored maternity plans while Nordic countries both dads and mums are given paid time off around the birth of their child. Such policies are there to help women succeed but they vary widely across the world if they are offered at all. It feels very piecemeal as it applies to core issues.

Religious and cultural pressures often defuse the female’s ability to be more independent. Everybody does something so that they can say, “We did something.” Large corporations hire token numbers of female applicants, governments, true to their heritage, establish “reasonable” quotas then throw money at the problem, while the companies, businesses and individuals that are left provide a few of the right sound-bites after which they will procrastinate in the hope that, by just leaving it alone, the problem it will go away. I mean … remember the advice your mum gave you when you found your first pimple … “If you pick it, it may become a boil … just leave it alone and it will go away.”

The Un-Level Playing FieldSo why, given good evidence to support changing the playing field by changing the rules of the game, do so many traditional corporations choose to follow the same path they have always followed? Why, when virtually everything around you has changed so fundamentally over the last 200+ years do they choose to cling so tenaciously to rules and policies and a paradigm that no longer works? Simple! The corporate world is run by men who lack common sense and the energy to re-engage life and change. The education system that led them there is unchanged and un-level when it comes to boys and girls. Yet girls are now in the lead both in numbers and qualifications in so many subject areas.  Maybe men have lost the entrepreneurial spirit that created ‘business’ in the first place 200 years ago.  Many have got caught up in ‘doing things right’ (i.e. to the rules of yesterday) and not paid attention to ‘doing the right things’ (i.e. acknowledging women are making the same or even greater contribution to current profitable markets as men do).

article-2254145-024165F50000044D-12_634x432

Common sense must rule the changes and an intelligent mutually beneficial blueprint put into action. Procrastination can no longer be tolerated. The time to rethink and rewrite the rules it TODAY … not tomorrow!

 

 

PHOTO CRAWFORD-OMPSCOMING TO THE UK FROM JUNE 14TH – 13TH JULY  AUTHORS PAULINE CRAWFORD AND JAMES OMPS WILL BE SHARING THEIR BLUEPRINT FOR SUCCESS AND PREVIEW OF THEIR BOOK ‘WHO’S IN CHARGE?’  Their approach is invite you to share the conversation by stepping onto a new blueprint that encompasses men and women of all shapes ans sizes, personality types and ages. It is a blueprint core to business and life and addresses all diversity issues that current challenge organisations today.

For details of their tour schedule during that time, available in Brighton and London, please email paulinecrawford.pc@gmail.com or what’s app +60132352225

CONFERENCE OPPORTUNITY WITH VOICE AT THE TABLE IN THE UK JULY 8TH LONDON

Join us for an opportunity to explore the dynamics of the playing field and how you can engage in the evolution revolution of a mutually beneficial future.

CHANGING THE PLAYING FIELD – Part 2 of 3

CHANGING THE RULES OF THE GAME 

By Dr Pauline Crawford, International Speaker & Facilitator

gender-pay-gap-women-fall-behind

Same-Old, Same-Old …

Okay … so you’ve been in a boardroom or two and you’re struck by how similar they are one to another. There is the imposing table that dominates the room with a dozen or so comfortable looking chairs surrounding it … whatever its shape. You also notice that the most comfortable looking of those chairs is located at one end of the table of the other. Now that we have a mental picture of the playing field that so many seem obsessed with changing, let me refer to my previous blog and reiterate the point that I made therein … the playing field is not the issue. More to the point, the goal must be – and the sooner the better – to consider, assess and change policy, procedure and dogma as warranted … in short … to change the rules of the game!

Small businesswoman

What or who determines how one must play the corporate game? Is it a policy manual gathering dust on an office shelf somewhere? If so, who compiled, composed, created, authored, inscribed, transcribed, engraved, penned, carved in stone, scripted, entered, and/or recorded that document? More than that, how are existing laws, rules, guidelines, dogmata, and accepted courses of action amended, edited, corrected, revised, modified, and/or rewritten? How does a qualified candidate/employee make it to that coveted prize … the top rung of the ladder of success? Is it truly policy or are things more controlled by a vote or two from what is – generally speaking, of course – a predominately male group of voters? What are the rules of the game that determines just who gets to pull his or her chair up to that majestic table and be one of those who decide the direction of the organization … the strategies and the big picture? Whether or not it’s a boardroom or an office that sits on the top floor with the great view, we need to know that this part of building is not built upon a glass floor.

http%3A%2F%2Fi.huffpost.com%2Fgen%2F2023872%2Fthumbs%2Fo-WOMEN-BOARDROOM-facebook
Men and women around the table making the future grow in innovative ways

It is imperative that we work to change the rules of the game. In order to initiate the process, we can no longer buy into those old arguments that continue to crop up every time one of us has the temerity to broach the subject of changing the rules? Those “same-old, same-old” conversations have been designed to drain our resolve in challenging the status quo. “Why fix what clearly is not broken,” is an expression that has absolutely no traction given the mountain of evidence to the contrary.  The system that was implemented more than 200 years ago IS broken, and it is far beyond ‘fixing’ at this point in time. It must – and it will – be changed and replaced. This journey to our future is about MEN and WOMEN succeeding and thriving together. That degree of change mandates a new blueprint, a “We are in this together blueprint,” where the old last is thrown away rather than using it to repair a worn out shoe or to cobble a new one that simply duplicates it.  A shoe that fits exactly as the old one did is simply a reiteration of that ‘same-old, same-old’ argument that we’ve been hearing for decades if not centuries. And just when should we anticipate the needed change be implemented? Well … in my opinion … The Time Is Now!

 

COMING TO THE UK FROM JUNE 14TH TO JULY 13TH AUTHORS PAULINE CRAWFORD AND JAMES OMPS ARE SHARING THEIR BLUEPRINT FOR SUCCESS AND PREVIEW OF THEIR BOOK ‘WHO’S IN CHARGE?’  Their approach is invite you to share the conversation by stepping onto a new blueprint that encompasses men and women of all shapes ans sizes, personality types and ages. It is a blueprint core to business and life and addresses all diversity issues that current challenge organisations today.

For details of their tour schedule during that time, available in Brighton and London, please email paulinecrawford.pc@gmail.com or what’s app +60132352225

CHANGING THE PLAYING FIELD – Part 1 of 3

CHANGING THE PLAYING FIELD

By Dr Pauline Crawford International Speaker and Facilitator

changing-the-rules-of-the-game_body_carousel

Are we misled by a lack of common sense?

As I watch the morning news on television, what I see is a world falling further into chaos with each passing day.  It causes me to reflect on the basic nature of men and women and the hope that something intrinsic and infinitely perfect will produce future generations of happy well-adjusted males and females who are truly counterparts. Still, my experience has been that men and women grow more contentious and antagonistic every day.

Today’s technology and the increasing exposure to global commerce can be very enabling. This digital equity – for lack of a better term – makes it possible for virtually everybody to access the global marketplace, regardless of ethnicity, culture or gender type. One would think that this, in and of itself, changes the playing field. Interestingly – and in my opinion – it does. One can actually see that the playing field has been changing all along. It’s kind of like when we were all kids … you could play your games in the house, in the garden, in the street or on a local playing field. The playing fields of our memories and those that exist today have changed right along with us.

Now let me ask you a question: are we all the same? In obvious ways, no we are not all the same. In other ways, however, we are. One of the key components we are apparently born with – and studies bear me out on this – is our innate desire to achieve.  Animals do not necessarily have this particular desire. Animals eat, sleep, hunt, procreate and die. We, on the other hand, have an inborn instinct to achieve, and when that desire goes unfulfilled, frustration and depression set in. This, in turn, can lead the male ego to engender anger, dissatisfaction and violence. These are all consequences of male depression. The sad reality is, if the male ego is blunted, females will, all too often, bear the brunt of the situation cheating10by being subjugated and disallowed the opportunity to explore their potential beyond the domestic setting to which they are consigned.

In our current and supposedly liberated and connected, world where globalization and social media often brings us news faster than we can cope with it, there are, in my considered opinion, too many women stuck in places and thrust into situations where men simply fail to value the resource that women are. Such situations will and do occur at home, in relationships, in a team environment and at work. The impact is always negative and always inhibitive.

Okay, so let’s say that we can accept the fact that the playing field – any playing field – is adequate for the larger purposes of our discourse on commerce and the myriad inequities and inequalities exposed therein. Let’s also agree not to pursue the argument that we need a level playing field or a better playing field or a new playing field. Consensus here is key to moving on to the more important issues. What – I’m sure some of you are thinking – is more important than a level playing field? How about … changing the rules of the game?

 

 

CONFERENCE OPPORTUNITY WITH VOICE AT THE TABLE IN THE UK JULY 8TH LONDON

Join us for an opportunity to explore the dynamics of the playing field and how you can engage in the evolution revolution of a mutually beneficial future.

 

COMING TO THE UK FROM JUNE 14TH TO JULY 13TH AUTHORS PAULINE CRAWFORD AND JAMES OMPS ARE SHARING THEIR BLUEPRINT FOR SUCCESS AND PREVIEW OF THEIR BOOK ‘WHO’S IN CHARGE?’  Their approach is invite you to share the conversation by stepping onto a new blueprint that encompasses men and women of all shapes ans sizes, personality types and ages. It is a blueprint core to business and life and addresses all diversity issues that current challenge organisations today.

For details of their tour schedule during that time, available in Brighton and London, please email paulinecrawford.pc@gmail.com or what’s app +60132352225